Adoption rocks! Or does it?

Adoption is bittersweet. Being a Mom has been the most amazing experience of my life, but I'm very aware of what had to occur to make it so. My beautiful little girl had to lose everything - a birthmother, a family, a culture, a country - in order for me to become her Mom. Would we have chosen that for her? No, not a chance. Will we be forever grateful to her Chinese mother who chose to give birth to her and to the one(s) who wrapped her in warm blankets and left her near a hospital so that she would be found quickly? Yes, absolutely. Inexplicable tragedy, unimaginable loss and profound grief -- not the most auspicious way to start a family. Adoption is not for sissies.

There are many reasons why she may have been abandoned, but we'll never know the exact ones. There were signs that she had been loved and cared for in those first few hours, and we'll make sure she understands that. I've read a great deal lately about angry and disillusioned adoptees, and it's been a bit disheartening to say the least. I am able to understand some of their feelings, but certainly not all (despite my older brother insisting more than once that I was adopted ... ). Everyone has their own path to follow and not one of us gets through this life without scars, adopted or not. I hope I have the right words for my daughters when they're ready to talk about it. In the meantime, I'll continue to pray that Elizabeth's birthmom knows that the intelligent, strong-willed, sassy daughter we share is a very happy and healthy little girl.

Our children are not ours because they share our genes ... they are ours because we have had the audacity to envision them. That, at the end of the day ... or long sleepless night, is how love really works. --- Unknown